How To Get Over Heartbreak
I have a very easy work email to remember - firstname.lastname@example.org - and listeners get in touch for lots of different reasons. Every email is read and appreciated! Yesterday, I received an email from a listener and my heart went out to her. She had just broken up with her boyfriend and it was all a bit much for her. I thought; well, everyone can relate to that. Have a read:
I’ve been listening for a few years, but haven’t text/emailed in before. Waking up to the show and the stories from the listeners always gives me a laugh – I don’t know how your listeners are so sharp and witty at that time of the morning, I’m still coming out of a sleepy haze, very much picture-no-sound for a while!
I don’t mean to be a downer but I wanted to ask if you (and the listeners) might help me to perk up a little tomorrow morning, as unfortunately I’m writing this with a freshly broken heart. My boyfriend broke up with me this week, I guess he just lost interest. I’m working from home today to wallow safely where no one can see, but tomorrow morning I have to go back to the office and so I need my badass-self back (or at least I need to put on a front). I work with & for men so saying that I want to work from home again because I’m upset…won’t go down well. Besides, I’m not a sap, I’m the strong one that my girls go to when something goes wrong, but inside I’m a hopeless romantic and I’ve let a stupid boy make me feel down, doh!
But music helps, and laughing helps. If possible, could you ask your listeners tomorrow what tunes make them feel better? And to be a bit cheeky on my side if you could ask for stories on how they got over a breakup, that would help. You probably have a plan ready for the show and that’s fine, I just thought I’d ask.
As I said, I don’t want to be a downer especially on a Friday!! I want to get back to being a badass and I want to enjoy my weekend so I’d be so grateful for anything that I can get to help pick myself back up!
Oh - and if you do mention this on air, could you not mention my name please. I don't want to admit the news to Mum yet, she'll just say she saw it coming... typical mammies!
Everyone has had days like these! I have had plenty! So we put it out to the listeners; can you help? Any advice/stories/tips?
- “Bit of Chumbawumba would cheer her up? I get knocked down... but I get up again!” – Warney on Snapchat
- “Won’t help with breakup but... Mr and Mrs Invisible got married. Kids were nothing to look at lol!” - Mike
- “Forget about that guy. Hold your head up keep smiling!” - Benny
- “Hi Paula that poor woman, we have all been there. The only bit of advice I would give is now she's knows that someone his type is not right for her. Anyway she should go out this weekend with some friends, get all dolled up, make herself feel good about herself and that she doesn't need him to have a good time. Life is good too without him in it!”
- “To the listener in need; when you wrote that email, you already won today! Now badass, get to work and kick some ass!”
- “Hi Paula, I've been in your listeners’ shoes. Only thing to do is get out, dress great, get busy in work- distractions are good. If you feel the weepies coming on in work, drink a bottle of water because it's impossible cry when drinking! Call your Mam tonight and tell her. The fear of that can't help and she will be sympathetic. Any girlfriend in work? Maybe tell her quietly so you have an ally in the office. You'll be grand girl!”
- “Distraction, keep busy and don't get caught up in your own mopey thoughts!”
- “Paula, my distractions are reading and lifting.”
- “Rule 1 don't pick up the phone, you know he is going to call you when he is drunk and alone...” – Noel/Dua Lipa
- “Heya Paula, anything by Eminem is always good - got me through my break-up with my ex. Distant memory now! Happy out with my new partner now, and two amazing little girls! Every cloud has a silver lining!” - D in Galway
- “Hi Paula! My sister got dumped 3 years ago by her then-boyfriend and she is getting married to the love of her life today! It was the best thing that ever happened to her - chin up!”
- “Oh, it's awful. But she just has to ride the waves of emotions that are inevitable. It will pass though. Love and hugs to her xxx”
- “Paula, a regular listener here. You always talk about your listeners...how many of us are there?” – a million or so, at a rough estimate. Thanks! Paula
- “Hi Paula, a great tip my sister gave me on my first break up was every time I got the urge to text my ex she told me to text her instead. It worked and helped me get over it quicker. I also made sure my evenings were taken up by exercise or meeting friends or helping out my parents with something. It gave me less time to dwell on things. Being angry at the ex also makes it harder. Just let it all go!” - Shane
- “Good morning Paula, tell that listener to keep on smiling and don't think about it; it was the right decision for you at that time. Now get back out there and enjoy life and most importantly, keep on being your bad ass self! Up have a great Friday!”
- “Hi Sweet P! Best thing for a broken heart is spend lots of time with good friends and do activities with them that you may not have done in a long time. Also, if she feels sad, she should embrace that and go through the emotions because otherwise it just builds up inside! You'll get through this girl, it may be the best thing that ever happens to you although it doesn't feel like it at the moment! (Speaking from experience here!)” - Lilly
- “Hey Paula, for that girl that recently broke up with her boyfriend; from a guy that was dumped 6 months before getting married, it's not how you’re knocked, it's how you get back up. It takes a bit of time to get over it but it all comes together!”
- “Paula as the song says Life Goes On, so tell her rock on and have fun! It's for living not dwelling on!”
- “Paula...play Dua Lipa New Rules for her... tell her to get her favourite breakfast!” - Ruth
- “Short term pain but long term gain. Keep up the good work Paula. Cheers!" - Noel.
- “Stay strong and go to the beach. Whatever the weather, it's soul cleansing!” - Adele Donegal
- "Paula about 12 years ago I thought I couldn't be happier. I had a ring on the finger and was planning a wedding. It suddenly ended and thank god it did! Almost 5 years ago I met the love of my life and he made me realise how easy a relationship can be. My new boyfriend puts my old boyfriend to shame. There are good guys out there and good things come to those who wait - talking from experience. For now, cry it all out for a day or 2. You'll be okay!"
The show clearly helped because "Badass", as we like to call her, got back in touch;
Wow thank you, and the listeners! It's like having a support network coming through the radio this morning, amazing and so helpful
I'm up, I'm dressed, I have my face on (water bottle in hand, great tip!) and I'm ready to head out to face the day now shortly.
Thank you all very much :)