Wedding Gift Woes - How Much I...

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Wedding Gift Woes - How Much Is Enough?

Jules Coll
Jules Coll

3:18 PM - 16 Apr 2019



MINT TO BE

We get lots of messages from listeners asking us to help solve their dilemmas and we're always happy to help!

One predicament touched a nerve with listeners today and sparked a big reaction...

Muireann - a quick one for your listeners. Have been invited to a wedding abroad next year. Do you give the same cash gift?

A MATTER OF WIFE AND DEBT

The opinions flooded in from across the nation...
No way, your attendance is their present, otherwise, Let them pay for flight accommodation etc. No way would I give present too. I'd give something if I didn't go. Tricia
 
Hello no. Your travelling for the wedding. That’s enough of a gift.
 
We got married abroad and acknowledged the cost and said to our family and friends that there was no need for gifts. Some still gave gifts of Money, others presents and some a card. We did appreciate all gifts / cards but never expected them.  If people throw luxury weddings they should not expect their 'guests' to pay for it. I have heard so many people bad mouth others for 'mean' gifts, they forget the cost of actually attending a wedding is expensive and not everyone can afford it.  Nicola

I think the couple should come out and say no gift please as everyone has gone to much effort. My husband went to a wedding in South East Asia last year which also had a weekend stag down the country in Ireland and ended up giving the standard cash gift cos all the lads were...I was like a bull as it all cost in excess of €1200 plus cash gift!! Brid in Drogheda

Muireann, tell your listener to just get a present and not give cash! You can spend what you can afford then! Weddings shouldn’t be a business!
I got married abroad and we told people not to give a gift of any sort as we just wanted them to come and enjoy themselves. Those who wanted to give a gift gave between 50-100. Shauna , Finglas
Hi Muireann, please don’t read out my name!! But a friend of mine got married almost 10 years ago and she told us she expected €300 per couple/ €150 per single person. Now I was single at the time , and I DID NOT follow along to those rules

Hi Muireann. We have been to 5 weddings abroad, be it Irish people getting married abroad or our European friends weddings. We gave €150 to all the couples. We treated all the weddings as mini holidays for us so the only extra expense was the gift. Life is much too short to worry about €50 extra or less in a wedding card, treat everyone the same. Brendan in limerick.

Muireann, tell your listener to just get a present and not give cash! You can spend what you can afford then! Weddings shouldn’t be a business!

 

I had my wedding abroad and most people gave the same as they would in Ireland. However, I was  shocked at this generosity. I thought beforehand, and still do, that coming all that way is gift enough. I was also shocked at the number of people that travelled, fully expecting many people not to come because of they expense, but most people came. People are so nice. But really, you should never over stretch yourself for a gift. Give what you can afford.  Louise

With regards to the wedding abroad ... We went to Italy last year for a wedding of a close friend and my husband was part of the wedding party. We gave €400. Honestly it was one of the best weddings I've ever been at. The food, the location, there was also a free bar after dinner. Yes you will spend alot alot more than an Irish wedding, but I think if you commit to it then you have to accept it will be costly, but worth it.  All in all it cost us €2,000 including flights, hotel, wedding gift, spending money.

We're always happy to help with your dilemmas. If you need the nation's advice you can message Muireann on moc@todayfm.com



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