Well That Backfired
We all have a story where despite your best efforts, you're left thinking well that backfired. My latest one was on Saturday. We were at a beautiful wedding in Dublin City Centre and when it came round to the speeches, we all threw a fiver in a glass and guessed how long the speeches would be, collectively. Now, when you win that game you get the money but then you're expected to go to the bar and buy a round for everyone which is a massive headache, so no thanks! Everyone was throwing their carefully thought-out guesses - 50 minutes, 45 minutes... and I went with 23 minutes. And WON!
Here are other backfire-stories:
- “Friend decided to draw on me one night. Lo and behold that was the night we found out I was allergic to markers. Was out of work for a few days, so didn’t earn any money, due to the rash because of the mickeys they drew all over my face.”
- “Was heading to work during the beast to load salt gritters and crashed my car.”
- “My cousin’s cat died when he was about 8, and it was winter so her mam put it in a box in the freezer so they could bury it when the ground thawed. They had a massive family and an extra freezer in the garage. Well, they forgot about it and found it 2 years later. Horrifying.”
- “Good morning Paula, I was in Super Valu during the snow. I saw that a check-out was gonna open, so I dashed over to be at the front of the queue. Half way through checking out, I realised I had left my wallet in the car! We had to cancel the transaction, go out for my wallet, and then join the back of a bigger queue!” - Jim
- “Paula, I was living with a girl, we had bought a house, had talked about getting engaged etc but hadn’t taken the plunge. Anyway we were coming home from my brother’s wedding, she was driving, and as we were going along she asks, do you see us getting married and being together forever...I thought for a few seconds and said...No. Word of advice; don’t break up with someone while they are driving!” - Larry from Waterford
- “My dad got my mam a fake scratch card for Christmas one year. She scratched it off straight away and it had said she won 10K. She started hysterically crying and jumping around the place. She was so annoyed when he told her and it definitely ruined the vibe for the rest of the day!”
- “Don’t do April fools by putting salt in someone's drink. I thought it would just be unpleasant.There was vomit everywhere. And I had to clean it up.”
- “Paula I worked for a summer at an amusement park back in the 90s and one day I was working the ghost train... which I loved. Had to wear a mask, make noises and sometimes if I was feeling really mischievous I would give an aul pinch or something. Well, I picked the wrong person this one day – I thought it was a teenager but it must have been a grown man because of the force of the elbow he gave me with the fright. Didn’t break my nose but blood everywhere and a nice shiner for a week!”
- “Paula in college my friend got drunk and egged my own house. He’s driving us to work now... hi John!
- “Morning Paula and happy Monday to you. Years ago my friend and I were in college studying for exams. I threw a firework left over from Halloween across the room. Needless to say, it exploded and burnt a hole in the carpet. We knew the Landlord would go ballistic so we spent the whole night trimming other parts of the carpet pile and super-gluing them into place to cover the scorch-mark. Good job we were good at jigsaws!”- Sean in Tralee
- “Paula once I saw an old lady drop loads of her shopping and ran over to help her. She let me pick it up, bring it to her car and place it in the boot before starting to shout blue murder that I was robbing her. No joke. Moral of the story; don’t help anyone, ever!”
- “I offered my seat to an elderly lady in the bus. She got offended and gave out to me!”