Kids these days eh? With their phonepads and their tweetface! They’re either hunched over or in front of some cycloptic screen of one sort or another with nothing but a trip to spec savers and rickets in their future!
Ok maybe we’re being a bit dramatic but a scant look into any child’s playbox will spark some nostalgia for the weird and wonderful toys that you played with in your days as a smally.
So we thought we’d light the pipe of the past and get your one who does the dreamy harp sound to look back at some of the best toys and games that filled your wonder years with the help of some Today FM children...we mean staff!
Operation
You'd like to think this actually gruesome game sparked millions of children into a life of medicine but imagine their horror when confronted with an actual human body that said victim didn't have their organs already conveniently on display nor a red nose that would buzz when you made a near fatal mistake. Also let's not forget the poor unfortunate man that we used for our experimental surgery is clearly awake throughout the entire horror. Still it was great craic!
Mr Pop
In this heady mix of Operation and Buckaroo, players had to assemble Mr Pop’s face before its contents flew all over the floor.
Great idea that, flinging sharp bits of plastic into children’s eyes at high speed.
Guess Who (Ed Smith)
If you think about it, Guess Who was really a precursor to Tinder. Brutally Eliminating unsuspecting innocents with the flick of a finger until you found the one you wanted. The makers really did an amazing job of making the faces fit the names too...less so the voices going by this awful ad.
Eagle Eye Action Man (Dermot Whelan)
Let's be honest ladies. There was no doubt that Barbie was very fond of Ken but really she only had the hots for one man...a real man...an ACTION MAN! With a scar that spelled trouble and arms that ended it, Eagle Eyes Action Man was the bit of rough that every playroom needed. That said looking at this photo it looks like he just stumbled out of a rave in 1991!
Petite 990 My Office Typewriter (Ann Gleeson)
No No...nothing sexist about this at all. Feminism is about choice and if you think about it young girls DID have choice. They could either cook, look after a baby OR if they wished to completely strike a blow, work as a secretary. The Petite 990 was literally marketed at young girls who's sole ambition was to be the office bossypants whilst the men lazed around. Incredible!
Poochie (Roisín Reilly)
"Poochie wasn’t just a doll, she was much MUCH more. She had an ink stamp on her feet and fancy paper and pencils. When you were a kid in the 80’s, fancy paper was the most powerful bartering tool you could hope for. I would save up all my paper and swap it at ‘big break’ at school for the even fancier ‘scratch and sniff’ fancy paper (smelled of REAL strawberries!)"
Mongoose BMX (Dave Moore)
"Bloody hell, I loved that bad boy. Kept it in my room upstairs. One night, I fell asleep downstairs and my Dad carried me up to bed. The opportunistic feckers nicked it from the back garden. :(
Still gutted today. Thanks guys. Thanks a bunch."
Oops...sorry Dave!
Fisher Price Garage
Ah if only all multi car parks were this colourful, straightforward and fun. A more up to date version would have a car wash service and a scowling couple laden with bags and kids trying to find their car.
Fisher Price Record Player
Another classic from the FP massive! The inspiration for budding DJ's the world over, The Fisher price Record Player had a limited catalogue but it was essential kit for any respectful tea party...that was until Action Man burst in and swept Barbie away the sexy dangerous brute!
Subbuteo (Michael McMullan)
Subbuteo was one of those phenomena where the concept was actually much more fun than the actuality. Painstakingly ironing the folds out of the pitch, assembling the stands and even buying your favourite teams who you would lovingly assemble across the freshly laid pitch. The build up was glorious and then you and your pals would attempt to recreate the most recent Match Of The Day and well...it was rubbish. Still it prepared this Spurs fan for years of bitter disappointment.
